


coming out is hard to do

by compulsivepoetics



Category: The Vampire Diaries (TV)
Genre: Baroline, Denial of Feelings, F/F, Femslash, Fluff, Light Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-20
Updated: 2019-10-20
Packaged: 2020-12-27 02:48:34
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,556
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21111431
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/compulsivepoetics/pseuds/compulsivepoetics
Summary: Caroline is sort of, kind of dating Tyler (but not really) and she's having a really hard time confronting her feelings for her best friend, who has already made her feelings clear to her. Bonnie feels hopeless with her feelings for the blonde and desperately tries to move on.





	coming out is hard to do

"So, um, I thought you were going to be busy tonight?" Bonnie asked her blonde friend, who was currently walking past her, having just arrived. She a little more than surprised to see her since she hasn’t been over in a while.

"I was,” She confirms, taking off her jacket and tossing it onto the couch, “but Tyler and the stupid football team is having some gay sleepover or something so I decided we could…” She trailed off, finally taking notice of Bonnie's attire. Her hair was curled perfectly and she had on a cute outfit with light makeup. She raised a brow. "Are you going somewhere?"

Bonnie played with her hands. "Um, yeah. I have a date."

Caroline looked taken back. "Oh."

"Yeah." Bonnie says awkwardly, looking around.

"Who is it?" She asked tensely with sharp eyes.

"Devon."

Her eyes widened. "From our Algebra class!?"

Bonnie fluffed out her curls a little. "Yep."

Caroline looked conflicted, biting her lip. "I don't know if this is a good idea…"

The witch furrowed her eyebrows. "What?"

"It's just, do you really know him? He could be a creep." Caroline said, while trying to think up other excuses to keep Bonnie from going on this date.

Bonnie rolled her eyes while walking into the kitchen. "He's not a creep, Care. He's really sweet and nice, plus this isn't our first date."

"Um, I'm sorry what did you just say?" She asked following Bonnie into the kitchen with an alarmed expression on her face.

"This isn't our first date." The small witch repeated from inside the refrigerator. She came out with a small bottle of water.

Caroline crossed her arms, feeling an attitude coming on strong. "So you've been going out with random guys behind my back?"

"Really? It's not _random_ guys. It's one guy. Devon. And it wasn't behind your back. You've been so busy with Tyler lately, it never came up."

Not faltering her stance, "does Elena know about him?"

The witch looked dumbfounded. "Well, of course-" 

"See!" She interrupted with accusatory eyes. "You told Elena and not me. You were intentionally trying to keep this from me."

Throwing her hands up, Bonnie huffed loudly. "I don't know why this even matters." She put her bottle on the counter top, looking back up at her. "Isn't this what you wanted anyway?"

Caroline's face scrunched up. "What I wanted? Why would I want this?"

"You obviously don't want me to want you." Bonnie said bitterly looking away from her. The blonde was slowly ruining her previous good mood.

"When did I say that?"

“You didn’t have to. You've made it very clear, especially lately." The brunette mumbled, walking back into the living room with her water. She leaned down, picking her earrings up off the coffee table to put them on. The blonde followed her with wide eyes.

"So you're just gonna date him!?"

"It's like you've always said, the best way to get over someone is to get under someone new." She said casually picking up get water and and drinking it.

Caroline's eyes bulged. "You're going to _sleep_ with him?!"

Bonnie shrugged. "Maybe. If the moments right."

Caroline pinched the bridge of her nose, with an irritated expression. "Why are you doing this, Bonnie?"

"Because I'm tired, Care. I'm tired of ending up at a dead end road. I want to have something special with someone."

She crossed her arms with an arched eyebrow. "And you think _Devon_ is going to give you something special?"

"Well Care, he can give me better than what I've been getting."

_Ding, Dong._

They looked to the door.

"That's him." Bonnie said, straightening out her shirt, preparing to walk to the door. Caroline grabbed her wrist before she could get too far.

"Bonnie." She looked deep into her emerald orbs. "Please, don't go on this date." She pleaded.

The witch searched the blonde's eyes, biting her lip. "Give me one good reason why I shouldn't." She demanded.

Caroline paused. She knew what Bonnie wanted her to say, but she just couldn't get herself to form the words.

The witch deflated, at her silence. "That's what I thought." She muttered going to the door, opening it. Devon, a tall, muscular brown-skinned guy, appeared with a beautiful smile and flowers in tow. Roses to be exact. Caroline rolled her eyes. Bonnie likes _sunflowers_.

"Hi, Devon!" Bonnie greeted brightly, trying to push the last five minutes out of her head.

He stepped in, pulling her in a hug. Caroline clenched her teeth. "Woah, Bonnie, you look great.” He said when he pulled back getting a better look at her. He held the flowers out for her. "Here, these are for you."

She smiled sweetly. "Thank you, they're really nice." She said, grabbing them. "I'm just going to go put these up. I'll be right back." She went back into the house, walking past Caroline without a word or glance. The blonde looked back to see she had disappeared further into the house. She turned around, narrowing her eyes at the boy on her doorstep. As she walked up, Devon turned at the sound of footsteps, a look of surprise crossing his face when she came into his view.

"Oh. Hey Caroline, I didn't know you were here."

She flashed him a fake smile. "Well, Bonnie is my best friend."

He chuckled, stuffing his hands into his pockets. "Yeah, I know. You guys have been tight for a while."

She scoffed. "Actually, a lot longer than that. We're _extremely_ close."

"Believe me, I know. She talks about you a lot."

This piqued her interest. "She does? What does she say?"

He opened his mouth to respond but was interrupted by Bonnie sliding up next to her. "What are you guys talking about?" She asked hesitantly, eyes darting back and forth between the two.

"Just how lucky I am to be taking out the most beautiful girl in Mystic Falls tonight." He said smoothly taking her hand and kissing it. Bonnie felt her cheeks get hot as she shot a nervous glance at Caroline. Even though she was clearly with Tyler and they were technically never together, she couldn't help but feel uncomfortable showing any kind of PDA in front of her. It almost felt disrespectful. The blonde just rolled her eyes in irritation.

"Well, we better get going. We don't want to be late to our reservation." Devon announced though his words fell on deaf ears. Caroline and Bonnie were staring intensely at each other. "Uh hey, Bonnie?" He laughed a little, oblivious to the thick tension between the girls.

"Hmm?" She said breaking her gaze and turning to him.

"I said we should get going, to catch our reservation."

"Right." She said absentmindedly. She turned back to Caroline with expectant eyes as if she was giving her one last chance. When the blonde did nothing but stare back at her, she purses her lips with a pained expression. She looked back up at Devon, pulling a quick smile. "Let's go."

He grinned down at her, leading her to his car. "Oh, see you around Caroline." He frowned when the blonde didn't respond, just stomping into the house, slamming the door. He looked bewildered at Bonnie. "What's her problem?"

The brunette was staring longingly at the closed door, thinking about the blonde behind it. "She's just, um... in a mood today." She finished lamely, not focused enough to answer thoughtfully.

He nodded, opening her door. She muttered a thanks, still looking at her house. She didn't know why she felt so guilty and concerned for the blonde when she did nothing wrong. She was trying to get over her. Well, trying and failing. But it's the effort that counts, right?

/

"Why didn't you tell me about this Devon guy!?" Caroline exclaimed, bursting into Elena's room, to see a flustered Elena and Stefan breaking apart on her bed.

"Hello to you too, Care." Elena said, breathing heavy, frowning at the blonde for interrupting so rudely.The blonde marched over to Stefan, pulling him off the bed. "Hey." She whined, watching her boyfriend being pulled away.

"Sorry Stefan, but I have to kill your girlfriend." She huffed as she pushed him out the door.

"Please don't." Was his last words heard before Caroline closed the door.

"What the hell Care?" The brunette said sitting up on the bed, with a frustrated look.

The blonde whirled around to her. “Why didn't you tell me Bonnie was seeing someone!?"

Elena looked a little sheepish. "Oh."

Caroline crossed her and with an unimpressed look. "Yeah, _oh_. What the hell, Elena?"

The brunette sighed, running a hand through her hair. "Look, Bonnie didn't want me to tell you."

"Yeah, I know. You still should have."

"Why, Care? You're with Tyler."

She snorted, “I’m not with Tyler."

Elena rolled her eyes, tired of hearing the same thing over again. "Well _whatever_ you two are doing together, Bonnie deserves to be happy with someone."

"I can't believe you're taking sides."

"And I can't believe you're being this clueless. Caroline. Bonnie's in love with you and you're in love with her. This thing with Tyler is only torturing the both of you and you know it."

The blonde looked at Elena for a moment, before rising from the bed. "I have to go."

"Why do you keep running away from her?" Elena exasperated at her retreating back.

"Because...I don't want to hurt her." She said softly, turning around.

"Well, it's too late for that. You're killing her Care. If you don't want to be with her, then fine. Bonnie will eventually have to get over it. But if you keep her at arms length, while acting like a jealous girlfriend any time someone comes near her... You keep sending her mixed signals and it's driving her crazy." She finished. She ran a hand through her hair again, shaking her head. "I told myself I wouldn't get in the middle of this…” She sighed, looking back up at her with a serious expression.

"What?" Caroline asked when Elena didn't continue.

"Bonnie told me this in confidence..."

"What is it, Elena?" The blonde asked, walking closer to her.

She bit her lip, really hating that she was breaking the girl’s trust. “It's just, Bonnie's going to do everything she can to get over you. Whatever it takes. She thinks she's ruining your friendship."

Caroline’s brows furrowed, running Elena’s words through her head. “Wait. What do you mean everything she can, whatever it takes?”

She looked down shaking her head. "I tried to talk her out of it. Like really tried but she's adamant-"

“Adamant about what?”

“She’s got it in her head if she and Devon go to the next level-”

"Wait are you saying Bonnie really is going to sleep with him!?"

"I don't know what she’s going to do. That's what it sounded like. I couldn't get through to her." Her eyes trailed over the blonde. "You're the only one who can, Care."

Caroline bit her lip with a conflicted expression. This wasn't Bonnie. She didn't sleep with random guys or anyone just because. It's just not her.

Elena walked over to her, putting a hand on her shoulder. "You're both my best friends and I want you to be happy. From what I've seen, you're the happiest when you're together and the saddest when you're apart. Despite whatever is holding you back, I think that says a lot.” She squeezes her shoulder. "Just trust your heart. Please."

Caroline processed her words.

Just trust your heart.

/

"Oh, I didn't know you were still going to be here." Bonnie said awkwardly when she opened her door to find Caroline pacing in her living room.

She stopped short at the side of her, suddenly feeling nervous. “How was your date?"

"It was...nice." She answered in a way Caroline just knew she was lying.

"Nice?" The blonde echoed with a lifted brow, crossing her arms.

"Well.. it was in the beginning." She sighed sitting down on the couch.

Caroline's eyebrows knitted together. "What do you mean?" She asked confused, then her face darkened. "Did he do something to you, Bon?" She demanded to know.

"No." Bonnie said shaking her head. "It was me. I ruined our date."

"What do you mean?" She asked, coming over and sinking down onto the couch next to her.

The brunette looked sheepish, biting her lip. She glanced up at the blonde. "I kind of spent the whole date, talking about…you. Thinking about you."

A look of surprise crossed her face. She didn't expect that. "Oh."

"Yeah.." She said looking down at her lap. "And after moaned your name while we were making out, he kind of figured out what was going on here. Needless to say, that was probably our last date.” She laughed nervously, eyes still glued to her lap.

Caroline didn't know what she should focus on more. The fact that Bonnie moaned _her_ nameor that she made out with someone else. She then decided to focus on Bonnie. Focus on what she came here for. "Bon-"

"You don't have to say anything, Care." She sighed getting up, walking a few feet. "I don't expect anything from you. I just…I wanted to be honest."

Caroline stood walking behind her. "Well now it's my turn to be honest." She turned the brunette around, grabbing her face to press their lips together. Bonnie let out a gasp against her lips before soon melting into the kiss. The blonde couldn't believe she's been denying herself this all this time. Settling for Tyler when she could have had everything with Bonnie. She didn't want to run from her anymore. Run from herself. She wanted to be _happy_.

Bonnie pulled back with flushed cheeks and confusion written on her face. "Wait." She breathed. "I thought you didn't want this. Want me."

Caroline's eyes softened as she grabbed the brunette's hand. "I always wanted this." She bit her lip. "I was just too busy caring about what other people think."

The witch looked at her skeptically. "And now you don't?"

The blonde looked sheepish. "Well, I mean I still do a little... b-but I'm working on that!" She rushed out when Bonnie's face started to fall. "What I'm trying to say is...I care about _you _more. I care about us figuring out and trying this more than I care about what people think."

A small smile creeped up on Bonnie's face. It must have been contagious because the blonde immediately grinned at the sight.

"So what does this mean..?" The brunette asked slowly.

"I think it means..." She pulled her extremely close, cupping her cheek. "No more dates with anyone else but me." She husked against her lips.

With her eyes already closed, Bonnie nodded. "Okay." She whispered before she felt Caroline's smooth lips on hers again. The blonde pulled back after a couple of seconds.

"Also, no making out with anyone other than your girlfriend."

Bonnie arched an eyebrow, a smirk playing on her lips. "Are you referring to yourself?"

"If that's okay with you." The blonde said, briefly feeling self conscious. The brunette pulled her back to where she was a breath away.

"It's more than okay." She claimed her lips.

It definitely more than okay.


End file.
